I was reading about Ellen Pao's sexual harassment lawsuit in Silicon Valley. I was struck by how a NYT reporter summarized the advice given to Pao by higher ups at her firm: “Speak up — but don’t talk too much. Light up the room — but don’t overshadow others." Check out this page from I Thought It Was Just Me - the 2007 book I wrote on women and shame. This is such a painful set up for women and girls. We need to do better. Thoughts?